Considering Orphans, my eyes have been opened this past month. At church it has been 3 weeks of Orphan Sunday (http://orphansunday.org/) and prayers for the defenseless children of the world. Millions of children fall through the cracks of society and I have been made painfully aware this month by the wonderful caring shepherding of our pastors. The numbers are staggering, and it seems a nearly impossible task to make a difference. But we must try, each one reach one could apply here. Do something, is more than to stand stagnant and do nothing. Isaiah 1:17 tells us to Defend the fatherless, this is a command we must obey.
Our little trip to Uganda is just a scratch in the surface. But it IS a start. It has been almost 10 years in the making. Many lives have been changed through the efforts of the Olive Branch Ministries team and Gary Dickinson in particular. And here we go, off to continue the journey. We are building a medical clinic. We will teach pastors how to minister to the people in the name of Christ. And we will offer fun and joy to the children of the orphanage.
I was thinking how different the orphanages in the US are from other countries, especially in Zziba Uganda. In the US the goal is to find homes for the children; either for foster care or adoption. In Zziba and other third world countries, the goal is to support the children and create resource and opportunity. There are not enough parents to go around.
But truly the goal is to change the mindset of the "haves" and to help them see ways to help the "have nots".
We must start with prayer. Our heavenly Father desires that we answer the cry and if we pray He will answer. Next steps...He will open doors of opportunity if we ask.
Pray for our team as we go and for the children and community of Zziba. Thank you
Monday, November 21, 2011
Friday, November 4, 2011
Some soul searching
Now comes the time when I look inward. Pastor Gary asked us to come up with "a 3 minute version of our testimony". At first I thought, what? There is no way to shorten this down to 3 minutes, but he gave us some guidelines and challenged us to keep it brief and to the point. So now I am trying to think back and look at the three sub-headings in order to help keep it brief and concise. The three sub-headings are:
The tough part so far has been examining what I was like before I met Jesus Christ.
This self-examination brings me to the "bad years". From about the time that I was 15 years old til I was 26 years old, I was searching; searching for Truth. I was raised in a family that went to church most every week. I was baptized when I was a baby, I was confirmed when I was about 14 years old and our family was friends with the Minister! Although I was raised in a privileged family atmosphere, there was an emptiness.
At age 15, I started to ask people in my life about the purpose of my life. I just felt sure that there was "more" to this life than the surface realities with which I had been raised; such as: looking good for people and doing the "right" thing so that people would approve, making impressions and having the "right" husband and and yes getting married. Being a virgin and having a Silver Tea Service, making my Debut, living in a big house in the "right" neighborhood. But, I just knew that life was about more than making good impressions and having a lot of material things. I asked my parents and my pastor and they all said that I was coming along just fine and that I didn't need to worry.
It's funny though, when asked what I wanted to be when I grew up, all I could think to say was that I wanted to help people. It wasn't to make a bunch of money, or to have a happy little family or to be famous. I just had a heart for hurting people and I still do.
Well anyway, when I was told that I didn't need to worry about it, I began to live a rebellious and purposeless life. It's kind of like the little kid that acts out in order to get the attention that he needs. Negative attention is better than no attention, isn't it? And with my parents; you were a good little child if you fit into the mold and didn't require any attention. And I was just that - BEFORE.
During the summer of 1966, my sister got married and I lost my friend. I felt I was losing control of my life and I was losing a lot more than that because I knew that I wasn't all that good, and I had "fooled" everyone into thinking that I was "just fine". The biggest loss was my self-respect. That summer I began to party a lot. My parents, not knowing what to do or how to handle me now that I wasn't fitting into the perfect little mold; shipped me off to boarding school. The same perfect boarding school that my friend went to. My friend's family was in the social crowd in our town and so my mom figured if it was the "right" school for her it would be the "right" school for me. A place where I could be locked away and learn to be a good little girl. Prep School - preparatory - prepared for what?
Interesting - I still had a heart to help people and I joined a group of girls that supposed to tutor poor kids in the inner city in Philadelphia. We took a bus down town to meet up with the kids and teach them for 1 hour per week. All the little rich white girls doing their civic duty. But for me it was an eye-opener. As we rode on the bus out of our safe privileged town to the dirty impoverished down town of Phily, it was like going through a tunnel and I saw for the first time the huge chasm between the way I lived and the way they lived. I felt very guilty and ashamed that all I could give was my little 1 hr tutoring session. My social awareness was broadened and I was changed!
During that time, I was still struggling with my inability to control my life. So many things were taken away from me when I was shipped off to school. My horse, my boyfriend, all of my friends from school, my school and clubs, my sister and my family.
I acted out by doing drugs, taking up bulimia , and seeking attention from boys. I threw myself at any boy that would look my way. I copied other girls and tried to look sexy like they did. I went with anyone that would invite me. I no longer had any discrimination or judgment as to what I wanted or felt, I just followed the crowd.
When I graduated from High School I was still out of touch with my parents. They didn't know me very well and they really didn't seem to care about me. As long as I was seeming to fit the mold they could go along as though none of the bad behavior was going on. I was really in a tug-of-war with myself - between being the good little socialite girl and living out the calling deep in my heart.
This vicious circle of behavior continued for the next 10 years. Meanwhile, I did a lot of crazy things, drove drunk, I was raped, I shoplifted, was caught and went to jail, I tried many drugs, I slept with any man that looked my way. During this time, I married the wrong guy, he controlled me or should I say I gave him control over me. He was a con and a wife beater, he convinced me to do wife swapping, open marriage, steal from insurance companies, and on and on. I was miserable. I was in search of myself and the answer to my existence. And my life was a lie. I tried to keep up the appearance of a perfect life, married, good job, nice belongings. But I had no self respect, I could not see that I had any value.
I had long since given up on a relationship with God. I actually can't remember when but I just somehow slipped away. When the people in my life didn't seem to care about my wishes and desires, I rebelled and went in search of my purpose.
As I look back, I know that God had been guiding me along the way, for many reasons, but mainly nothing truly serious happened to me. I can see His divine protection in the fact that I didn't die, I didn't have any permanent damage from my drug usage, no one physically hurt me...As I think about it, I was searching around in a maze. Trying every avenue, and finally the path brought me to Stan Stafford. We moved up to Grand Lake. Our plan was to get married and live in the mountains.
Somehow I just knew that I wanted to get married in a church. So in my search for the "perfect" church, I found a quaint little chapel in the woods in Grand Lake. When I went inside to check it out, I met a man there. This man was the Pastor and he asked me "why do you want to get married in a church?" I didn't know why but I just "knew" I wanted to. It was the turning point of my life. I went in there because it was the "right" thing to do and I found out that God had been waiting for me to come to him because it was the Right thing to do. We sat and talked about why I wanted to marry in a church and by a minister and the pastor led me to the truth - which was that I was hungering for God in my life. He told me that Jesus is God and not merely a good man or a prophet and that by asking Him into my life I could have a personal relationship with God. That day I met the Lord Jesus Christ. I had finally found the path that God was guiding.
As I have grown in Christ, I have tried to piece together my Swiss-cheese memory of those 10 years. I have tried to make some sense of it all. Someone asked me the other day while I was telling them this story..."why do you think God let you go through all of this? Your heart wanted a relationship with Him way back when you were in Junior High", (when I was confirmed). I loved Him then and I chose to break away and leave Him for those 10+ years. But God is faithful, he kept me safe until I would come back to Him and accept Him on His terms. Until then I had wanted Him to be the god of my parents. A god that was another trophy on my wall of accomplishments, the "right" thing to do.
Today, I know that there was always a God-shaped hole in my heart. And no matter what I tried - it just could not be filled by anything other than the God who created me. I now understand and deeply perceive that He is the only One who truly values me. This whole process had to be gone through so that I would find my value in God. So that I would find my calling in Him. So that I would understand how much God loves me. So much that He sent His Only Son to pay the price for my rebellion and sin so that God could spend eternity with me. I would never have valued the Gift if I hadn't seen my depravity and Price that was paid to save me from the path of destruction that I was headed down.
- What I was like before I met Jesus Christ and then came to the realization that I needed a Savior rather than my family's faith.
- How I met Jesus Christ (received and accepted His forgiveness)
- What Christ has done in my life since (How my faith has helped me)
The tough part so far has been examining what I was like before I met Jesus Christ.
This self-examination brings me to the "bad years". From about the time that I was 15 years old til I was 26 years old, I was searching; searching for Truth. I was raised in a family that went to church most every week. I was baptized when I was a baby, I was confirmed when I was about 14 years old and our family was friends with the Minister! Although I was raised in a privileged family atmosphere, there was an emptiness.
At age 15, I started to ask people in my life about the purpose of my life. I just felt sure that there was "more" to this life than the surface realities with which I had been raised; such as: looking good for people and doing the "right" thing so that people would approve, making impressions and having the "right" husband and and yes getting married. Being a virgin and having a Silver Tea Service, making my Debut, living in a big house in the "right" neighborhood. But, I just knew that life was about more than making good impressions and having a lot of material things. I asked my parents and my pastor and they all said that I was coming along just fine and that I didn't need to worry.
It's funny though, when asked what I wanted to be when I grew up, all I could think to say was that I wanted to help people. It wasn't to make a bunch of money, or to have a happy little family or to be famous. I just had a heart for hurting people and I still do.
Well anyway, when I was told that I didn't need to worry about it, I began to live a rebellious and purposeless life. It's kind of like the little kid that acts out in order to get the attention that he needs. Negative attention is better than no attention, isn't it? And with my parents; you were a good little child if you fit into the mold and didn't require any attention. And I was just that - BEFORE.
During the summer of 1966, my sister got married and I lost my friend. I felt I was losing control of my life and I was losing a lot more than that because I knew that I wasn't all that good, and I had "fooled" everyone into thinking that I was "just fine". The biggest loss was my self-respect. That summer I began to party a lot. My parents, not knowing what to do or how to handle me now that I wasn't fitting into the perfect little mold; shipped me off to boarding school. The same perfect boarding school that my friend went to. My friend's family was in the social crowd in our town and so my mom figured if it was the "right" school for her it would be the "right" school for me. A place where I could be locked away and learn to be a good little girl. Prep School - preparatory - prepared for what?
Interesting - I still had a heart to help people and I joined a group of girls that supposed to tutor poor kids in the inner city in Philadelphia. We took a bus down town to meet up with the kids and teach them for 1 hour per week. All the little rich white girls doing their civic duty. But for me it was an eye-opener. As we rode on the bus out of our safe privileged town to the dirty impoverished down town of Phily, it was like going through a tunnel and I saw for the first time the huge chasm between the way I lived and the way they lived. I felt very guilty and ashamed that all I could give was my little 1 hr tutoring session. My social awareness was broadened and I was changed!
During that time, I was still struggling with my inability to control my life. So many things were taken away from me when I was shipped off to school. My horse, my boyfriend, all of my friends from school, my school and clubs, my sister and my family.
I acted out by doing drugs, taking up bulimia , and seeking attention from boys. I threw myself at any boy that would look my way. I copied other girls and tried to look sexy like they did. I went with anyone that would invite me. I no longer had any discrimination or judgment as to what I wanted or felt, I just followed the crowd.
When I graduated from High School I was still out of touch with my parents. They didn't know me very well and they really didn't seem to care about me. As long as I was seeming to fit the mold they could go along as though none of the bad behavior was going on. I was really in a tug-of-war with myself - between being the good little socialite girl and living out the calling deep in my heart.
This vicious circle of behavior continued for the next 10 years. Meanwhile, I did a lot of crazy things, drove drunk, I was raped, I shoplifted, was caught and went to jail, I tried many drugs, I slept with any man that looked my way. During this time, I married the wrong guy, he controlled me or should I say I gave him control over me. He was a con and a wife beater, he convinced me to do wife swapping, open marriage, steal from insurance companies, and on and on. I was miserable. I was in search of myself and the answer to my existence. And my life was a lie. I tried to keep up the appearance of a perfect life, married, good job, nice belongings. But I had no self respect, I could not see that I had any value.
I had long since given up on a relationship with God. I actually can't remember when but I just somehow slipped away. When the people in my life didn't seem to care about my wishes and desires, I rebelled and went in search of my purpose.
As I look back, I know that God had been guiding me along the way, for many reasons, but mainly nothing truly serious happened to me. I can see His divine protection in the fact that I didn't die, I didn't have any permanent damage from my drug usage, no one physically hurt me...As I think about it, I was searching around in a maze. Trying every avenue, and finally the path brought me to Stan Stafford. We moved up to Grand Lake. Our plan was to get married and live in the mountains.
Somehow I just knew that I wanted to get married in a church. So in my search for the "perfect" church, I found a quaint little chapel in the woods in Grand Lake. When I went inside to check it out, I met a man there. This man was the Pastor and he asked me "why do you want to get married in a church?" I didn't know why but I just "knew" I wanted to. It was the turning point of my life. I went in there because it was the "right" thing to do and I found out that God had been waiting for me to come to him because it was the Right thing to do. We sat and talked about why I wanted to marry in a church and by a minister and the pastor led me to the truth - which was that I was hungering for God in my life. He told me that Jesus is God and not merely a good man or a prophet and that by asking Him into my life I could have a personal relationship with God. That day I met the Lord Jesus Christ. I had finally found the path that God was guiding.
As I have grown in Christ, I have tried to piece together my Swiss-cheese memory of those 10 years. I have tried to make some sense of it all. Someone asked me the other day while I was telling them this story..."why do you think God let you go through all of this? Your heart wanted a relationship with Him way back when you were in Junior High", (when I was confirmed). I loved Him then and I chose to break away and leave Him for those 10+ years. But God is faithful, he kept me safe until I would come back to Him and accept Him on His terms. Until then I had wanted Him to be the god of my parents. A god that was another trophy on my wall of accomplishments, the "right" thing to do.
Today, I know that there was always a God-shaped hole in my heart. And no matter what I tried - it just could not be filled by anything other than the God who created me. I now understand and deeply perceive that He is the only One who truly values me. This whole process had to be gone through so that I would find my value in God. So that I would find my calling in Him. So that I would understand how much God loves me. So much that He sent His Only Son to pay the price for my rebellion and sin so that God could spend eternity with me. I would never have valued the Gift if I hadn't seen my depravity and Price that was paid to save me from the path of destruction that I was headed down.
Tuesday, November 1, 2011
Its been a whirlwind
Its nine weeks and counting down to departure day on January 3rd.
We are doing a Fundraiser on November 12th. It should really be fun.
There will be a dinner, and music and an auction for some really great items such as vacation Condos, Auto Repair services, Jewelry and lots more. We are hoping to raise $6000 to fund the building or should I say the finishing of the Medical Clinic building in Zziba. Very exciting. Eventually there will be a nurse and a traveling doctor working in the clinic and we expect to impact the lives of hundreds if not thousands of people in the region.
We are doing a Fundraiser on November 12th. It should really be fun.
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